Who is Milisa Burns?

This is a story of a little girl who could be anything she wanted to be. The world was her oyster! She had choices and the utmost love and support of her family and friends. She did very well in school. She was particularly good at math. She didn’t ever see herself as especially creative – she wasn’t great at art. What would she be when she grew up?

She didn’t really know…but she knew it was going to be good; she was going to have it all. The loving, wonderful husband. The beautiful children. The warm circle of friends. And the rewarding career. Somehow she would make it all happen.

She went off to university; since she wasn’t sure of her direction, she chose a liberal arts degree, to “keep all her doors open”. She loved the learning. She thrived there.

Then graduation approached. What would she do next? Again, she wasn’t sure. Law beckoned. She could combine her diverse interests and learn more about politics, business and history, all wrapped up in a law degree. It sounded good. She went to law school.

Again, she loved the learning. She met fantastic brilliant people, including her future husband. She thrived there too. She felt full of possibilities. And her dreams were starting to take shape. She had her soul mate! She had wonderful friends and family. And she had the foundation for her career.

Then decision-making time approached again. What was next?
The big law firms beckoned. She was wined and dined, and yes, somewhat dazzled by it all. She would go for it, see what it was all about: a big corporate firm. She articled there. She was “hired back”, even in time of a recession. And so was her new husband. They were on their way! They were set. They just had to work hard and they would be successful.

Two and half years passed in the blink of an eye. She (like her husband) worked really hard. She was really stressed. She loved her personal life. Of her work self, she asked: Is this it? Is this all there is? Or she would have asked those questions if she had even made the time for reflection. She was too busy reacting to all the demands she perceived were being made of her. She was learning and growing, to be sure and had many, many valuable experiences at work. But she was not happy.

She was invited to go to one of the firm’s overseas offices for a short time. She took it. She grew some more. Then she decided to take a different job. Her firm was very gracious about it all. She went to be in-house counsel.

Again, she was in reaction mode all the time. She was not at her best. She did learn, she did grow, she developed some great relationships. But she was not happy. She was drained. She was 30. It was time to get pregnant and shake things up.

She got pregnant. She was thrilled. She worked right up to her due date – best to keep all the “mat” leave for after the baby’s born, of course! She had a beautiful baby boy! She and her husband were parents! She was a mother. It was the hardest and most beautiful adventure she had ever been on. All of the sudden, her mind was free (while her body was extremely busy looking after her baby.) Her mind was so happy to have space to reflect in: no more just reacting to everything. She was able to reflect, be proactive. She was so happy. And she was physically exhausted and stressed at times. She was fully in it.

A year later, she joined a mothers group, which welcomed her into a warm new community. Three years later she had another child, a beautiful baby girl! Then she began to make some very dear friends right in her neighbourhood, something else she had been yearning for.

Now almost all of her dreams had come true…she wondered though, would she ever find work that she was passionate about? Work that would give her energy instead of draining her? She heard about a new profession called “coaching”. She investigated it. It wasn’t long before she had a huge wave of intuition that YES, this was right. NOW she was going to follow that intuition. She did the first round of training. She was still pining for a third child. But how could she have a career and the third child too? In her coach training, she was coached. Being the client, she was able to reflect and realized it was possible. But she was going to have to be creative about it. Oh, but she wasn’t the creative type, was she? Then she found out that in coaching, the assumption is that everyone is creative, resourceful and whole. Oh, then she must be creative. “They” were assuming she was. Ok, then how was she creative? She was excited by the prospect of making her own coaching practice – she thought “I will make it me!” And she hasn’t looked back. She had her third baby, another beautiful baby boy. She is blessed.

She is a coach. She lives it and breathes it. It has changed her, forced her to grow, to evolve.

Was she happy now? YES. But, how could she be happier? By changing the world. By continuing to grow and learn and be in community with others who want to grow and learn together. And in the process, make the world a better place. A world which will be a healthy place for all of her children and grandchildren and their grandchildren to live in harmony with each other and with nature. She is inspired by the experience of mothers everywhere: they, especially new mothers, epitomize being powerful and vulnerable at the same time. They are powerful in their vulnerability. That is the way she wants to be. To be transparent. To be authentic. To help inspire others to be the way they need to be to grow and evolve.

And the story continues…

Please help me write it!


Dear Readers,

I welcome your comments…

What’s your story?
What does my story make you think about?
How is it different from your story?
How is it similar?
What are you noticing now?

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2 Responses to Who is Milisa Burns?
  1. Jerry Bame
    January 31, 2011 | 3:58 pm

    Hello Milisa – –
    I don’t know how I was referred to, or got, your website, but I did and I read your wonderful story. Pherhaps it is because we are members of the same SIG group (although I rarely participate on the line).
    This year is my 50th year as a member of the California State Bar, and I have been coaching lawyers for the past 11 years. The focus of my coaching practice is on UNHAPPY lawyers – – I have clients (unhappy lawyers) across the country. I am sure you can resonate with that.
    I want to wish you luck in your new coaching endeavor.
    Just remember, however, that your true love is your husband and wonderful children.

    Jerome M. Bame, Esq.
    Coach-Mentor-Confidant to Lawyers
    Fountain Valley, California

    • Milisa Burns
      February 1, 2011 | 1:49 pm

      Hi Jerry, thanks so much for your supportive and wise comments. Your depth of experience is truly impressive! It never hurts to be reminded where our true loves are and how they need to be nurtured! cheers, Milisa PS Yes, our connection is through the legal SIG group of the ICF.

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